Sometimes it is hard to be "family"

I don't know what it is here lately ... maybe I am just reading to much into stuff... maybe I am just looking for something...

I have wrote a post before about how my inlaws don't make it a priority to visit Lyla...when they do see her it is at church...except for the one exception when they took her and my nephew to the movies...
but she never gets invited to go to Nanny and Pappaws house like my nephew does....she never spends the night at thier house...she never gets time with them to herself....
it makes me sad for her...and it makes me mad...but I don't say anything...it isn't my loss ..it thiers..

But now they are like completely ignoring me....I don't know what we did to be disowned from the family...or if my sister in law being pregnant with a girl has completely erased Lyla ...and hopefully I am completely off base here and reading way to much into things...

but for some crazy reason...you can't deny actions...they don't talk to me...not a hi, bye, nothing!

This morning in church I was praying and crying..none of them prayed with me...

Maybe I am being sorry for my self...but the biggest part of me wants to forget it all and not even deal with the negativity that comes from them....but the small part of me feels for Lyla and wants her to have a relationship with every family member she can...because that is all you have in this world....

but on the other hand....she has another grandma....and my step dad....and my real dad....and my brother...and many many friends....

so what is stopping me from just cutting ties?

Family Competition

So last night our Bible Study Group decided instead of meeting...since this is our last meeting (because during the summer we go to the church for an actual church service) ..we should go out to eat and have fun.



My Father in law called me to see if I was going ...I said sure...once I got my hurricane down for a nap. He said GREAT ..you can just ride with us if you want..we will pick you up.



I was thinking Yay! Lyla will get to spend some good quality time hanging out with her grandma and grandpa that she doesn't see very much...don't know why she doesn't see very much of them...because they live just a way up the road..but they never come by...don't know why they never come by because they can always make it to my sister in law's house to visit thier grandson...their must be something in the road that blocks them from coming this direction to see thier granddaughter.



Anyway....

We went to a steakhouse and had a nice dinner....Well..I had to wrestle a two year old by myself..so I had close to nice dinner...then afterwards we all went back to our cars to go home...in the process...my nephew starts to scream bloody murder that he wants to ride with his Papaw...In his Papaw's truck..with me...Lyla...and my mother in law.....in the truck...

Papaw explains to him that he has to take me and Lyla home so there isn't enough room...while Mother in law says...SURE THERE'S ENOUGH ROOM!!

*rolls my eyes*
sure there is enough room...if I stand on my head and put Lyla on my back...sure there is enough room.

So now we have suddenly made plans to go to the park.

At 8pm.

We get to the park....after the screaming contest on the ride home from the two and three year old sitting side by side in the back seat of Papaw's truck.

Lyla takes my mother in laws hand to go swing...but then my nephew hollers for my mother in law...then my sister in law..screams for my mother in law to let her know that HE wants HER to play with HIM....

oh..excuse..me...Let's just throw my child to the wind...forget that we were trying to spend time with her grandma and grandpa that she never gets to see...just forget her and go play with the child that you watch all the time...14 hours a day...while they go to school and work...and to the movies..and to have a parent break from baby...while they are preggo with another one....

So needless to say I am to the point of disowning the other set of grandparents and saying forget it

She has a great set of grandparents who love her dearly..and would give up what they were doing if we called to have them watch her so that we could have a date night to ourselves..which we NEVER ask for!!!! I am sick of the family competition...I am sick of trying to stick up for my daughter...I am sick of trying to pull attention to my daughter just so she could spend a little time with her grandparents...

I am sick of it!